Ancient Eyes
by asphodelmoonlight
Summary: The Doctor fears losing his newborn daughter. River/Eleven ONE-SHOT. "Tell me this Doctor, what would have become of this world had you not cared?"


Ancient Eyes

The Doctor had been a father before - a long time ago. Back in Gallifrey where the sky's burnt red he had been a father, a grandfather even. But those days were long since past. Gallifrey was gone and with it all of the Doctor's children. All but one.

Laid neatly in River's arms was a tiny little green-eyed baby. Her tiny little hands were balled up into fist's and they pounded at the the air. River delicately ran a hand down the little girl's soft rosy pink cheek, before placing a subtle peck upon the baby's forehead. "Isn't she beautiful? My love?"

The Doctor was still dumbstruck. Just two hours ago River had showed up on the Tardis doorstep with a baby wrapped in her arms. A baby that she had claimed to be his. After many a tests, the Doctor had finally come to accept that the baby was in fact his. But he did not feel like a new father should. He did not feel happy nor did he feel excited. He felt nothing, just sorrow, sorrow for yet another life he would someday come to lose.

River looked up at him expectantly, as if expecting some wide smile to grow upon her beloved's face. She saw none of course. The doctor turned his back and stared coldly at the wall. The tiny little gurgles of the baby echoing throughout the Tardis - the only noise amongst all the silence. He focused in on another sound. This sound however could not be heard be River, only by him. The strong and consistent beat of his daughter's two hearts, pounding against her tiny rib cage.

"Doctor?" River spoke. She hardly ever called him Doctor - Only when she was serious about something. The Time Lord turned to face River, she rocked the baby ever so slightly. "Why do you despair? Today should be a good day. We should be celebrating?"

"What's there to celebrate?" The Doctor asked. His tone cold and without emotion. The Doctor could be scary sometimes River knew this. Amongst all the good was a darkness that was buried deep within. If you dug deep enough you would find it. "Another life brought into the world - Another life for me to destroy,"

"Is that what you honestly think my love?" River spoke. Her eyes glazing with tears. The little time-baby sensing her mother's despair began to wail ever so gently. "Do you honestly believe that you would ruin your daughter's life?"

"I don't believe it, I know it," The Doctor spoke, his tone angry. A suppressed rage hid behind his eyes. "I'm like a disease - everything I touch whithers and rots. I won't allow myself to love her - like I allowed myself to love everyone else. She'll just die, fade and whither like everyone else and once more I'll be left alone."

River felt a tear drop down from her cheek. "I am still here. I have not faded and I have not whithered,"

The irony of River's statement was not missed on the Doctor. He had already seen River's demise. She had already faded and whithered in his lifetime, although she may not have known it now. The Doctor laughed, a cruel and empty laugh. In that moment he sounded very much like a madman. "There is no point in me caring for her...I'll just lose her!"

"I don't believe for one moment that you believe those words that have just left your lips," River stood up, baby in tow. She took a few long strides towards her beloved and ran her free hand through his deep brown hair. "There is every point in caring and you know it better than I. Tell me this Doctor, what would have become of this universe had you not cared?"

The Doctor fell silent. Before he could protest he felt a warm weight enter his arms. It was a weight he had not felt for a long time. He stared down at the little girl. Tears building in his ancient eyes. River took a step back and leant against the Tardis controls.

The Doctor stared at the baby for what felt like years, marveling at her tiny features. Her tiny little hand reached out from beneath the blanket and grasped his thumb. The overdue tears finally dropped from his eyes and spilt down his cheeks. River had been right, as she always was. No matter how much death and destruction there was in the world, how much war and anguish ensnared the lands, the world would have been a much worse place had the Doctor not cared.

The doctor took one deep breath and placed a light kiss on his daughter's forehead, murmuring something in a long-forgotten tongue before turning to River. "Do you have a name River?"

"Hope," River smiled. The Doctor smiled back through his tears. There was hope for him at last.


End file.
